Si m-am mai prins de o chestie...

Uitandu-ma din nou la perioada in care am inceput blogul, si la cum arata jumatatea mea de an in care l-am ignorat, m-am prins de ce a devenit "webpage non grata".

L-am inceput din vina unui "painful feeling of non-belonginess" aproape de implinirea a 4 ani de la Cata, dupa o oboseala crunta si 7 kile in minus dupa ITC, dupa doi ani jumate ce au ofilit.

Intens momentul facerii. Ca la carte. Cu preludiu lung, du-te vino... de era sa raman de o fericire virgina in anul ala.

Dar a urmat o penetrare adanca.....si parca o usoara retragere...si din nou si mai adanc.
Si cu sentimentul asta al neapartinerii adanc in mine, a trebuit sa nasc cuvinte.
Eu cuvinte, fecundatorul neapartinere...si iata un blog cu pseudonim, care prin urmare e al meu dar nu imi apartine.


De atunci insa, in cele 6 luni , am redevenit un vant care stie si sa adie.

Desi ratiunea actului initial al facerii a disparut, ma gandesc sa il pastrez, pe el, blogul.

Adica ce...daca te amesteci cu un om misto si faci un copil misto din asta, dar ulterior misto-ul creste o burta uriasa sau un comportament tzepos si dispare ratiunea facerii initiale...nu pastrezi copilul?

Draga blogule, vei fi un copil fara tata, pentru ca pe taica-tu l-am ucis cu mana mea. Ba am avut si oameni in jur care l-au ucis incetul cu incetul odata cu mine.

Si eu am ucis pentru oamenii astia cu mici lovituri de cutit fecundatori din viata lor care ieseau la baut cu taica-tu, intr-o carciuma cu pahare vizibile doar pe jumatatea goala.

Na, era un betiv care ducea paharul asta des la gura, pana a golit goliciunea.Si din preaplinul momentelor misto ce au ramas in lipsa goliciuni baute, te voi creste un betiv draga blogule.Insetat de preaplin.

I forgot about my blogg...

My friends, my parents, my sister, and so on... say I’m "uituca". I love them so I try to prove them right on a daily basis.

But I have managed to overcome even my own expectations, when I realized today that I forgot for weeks that I had this blogg, a virtual space at my own disposal to play with.

When writing www.blogger.com it directly opened this page. Uau...this is me...Hello Oana ! It seems the virtual space likes me after all if he remembered me so.... Maybe all those viruses it constantly troughs at me are just a childish....kindergarten boy like ...ways of showing that he likes me. I don't even know why I am surprised. The internet, somehow in the state I know him; it's actually barely a grown-up. Si-o fi serbat majoratul:)? Cum s-o comporta internetul beat crita incercand sa bage o gagica, beata mai putin dar destul cat sa pretinda ca nu stie ce face, intr-un dormitor in seala balului? Stiu cum arata google in costum negru de bal (http://www.blackle.com/) ...la internet nu prea ma prind dar imi imaginez ca ar merita un dans in carnetul meu de vals.

I got so girly nervous about the internet liking me that i instinctively returned to romanian, although at some point my non-romanian speaking AIESEC friends might visit me and it would not be polite to welcome them so...

Faithless- "I know it's not easy to love someone like me" .......but for those who do......who have...who willl.......i give my respect.

take the easy way out

It is incredibly easy not to believe.
Not to have faith.Not to have hope. Not to treat people with the assumption that they are worth your time an thoughts.

It is so easy not to believe. So easy that absolutely everybody can do it . On a daily basis.

Stop reading.It is useless

Do you realise that you just spent more than 10 seconds reading this post?
There is absolutely nothing interesting here.You could more wisely use this time by reading a book from a wise man (i recommend "Agonie si Extaz") or giving a hug to someone that needs it.
That is why i am writting...because all the people that could have hugged me now are doing something else.

So stop reading...and create joy.
I stopped writting.A book awaits me near the bed.

You don't serve the world by beeing

when coming from a beer with a group of true authentic people (former work coleagues) I stumbled across some quotes put on the walls of "Universitate". It was strange to get small pieces of pshilosophy and culture whille waiting for the bus...but i remembered the incredible feeling of self discovery through reading.

The world has no meaning if you don't try to undersand it, and you don't either.The thirst for knowledge, development, growing and doing so by interacting with the world around you (people, books,... ), that is what brings fulfillment.

I miss reading and i wonder how much time did i fulishly spent on other things, how much meaning did i lose for i did not stop to try to understand the moments of my life.

I start this blog for all the wrong reasons.

No sparklig thoughts that i can share, no magic in my words, no pretty pictures of me.

Just an almost painfull feeling of "non-belonginess".

A windchild that has for this evening settled in the virtual space.